Do you want your child to be repressed and depressed or full of life and laughter? I know…stupid question….of course you want a vibrant, happy, alive, energetic, healthy child! So, what can YOU do to make sure this happens? YOU need to become (if not already) full of LIFE and LAUGHTER! How? By EXPRESSING yourself! When you express yourself authentically at ALL times it is impossible to be repressed and depressed.
I am observing my one year old. She’s walking around, picking things up, putting things down and exploring her world. She’s saying “Ahh” here and “oo” there and “gibligobligoop” everywhere. Her older sister takes the little thing that she found on the floor from her to stop her from swallowing it. My one year old screams,“Wahhh!!!” at the top of her voice and falls down to the ground expressing her devastation. After 15 seconds or so she gets up and moves on to find something else to pick up, touch, put in her mouth…as if nothing has happened. One year olds still fully express themselves at all times. They feel something, they express it – using their voice and their body – and they move on.
Throughout life, many of us have slowly learnt that it is NOT OK to express ourselves. In fact, some of us first began to experience this repression as babies or young children. We’ve been taught that if we yell and scream (to express how we feel) our parents won’t like us, will disapprove of us, will take something away, will abandon us, will hurt us or will yell at us. This of course is too scary for a vulnerable infant or child to bear so they decide that it is safer to stay quiet and “be good”. For them, it is safer to keep the peace, to gain approval, to be loved, to stay alive!
This part of us that is not approved of (eg. expressions of anger, sadness, lying, being “mean”, being “needy”, being loud when excited) becomes our “shadow”…the part that is not allowed to be seen by others and even ourselves! If you haven’t become aware of your shadow parts yet you may notice that they’ll keep popping up all over the place – much to your shock and horror! They will keep doing this until you finally notice and embrace them as a part of yourself that requires your unconditional love and acceptance. If you can do this for yourself you will be able to respond appropriately to your child’s needs rather than trying to repress them.
When your are in labour you may notice yourself holding back your true sound to once again “keep the peace”, be pleasant or to not upset anyone . Whatever the unconscious reason is that’s holding you back (repression) it is also unfortunately holding back that baby! Having a Soundbirth is also about birthing yourSELF. Let labour be an opportunity to give yourSELF permission to open up on ALL levels so that you and your child can both be born expressing your true sounds and be fully alive human beings! WooHoo!!!