The Sync and Sigh Exercise for Birth

"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them." - Ralph Nichols

During my third homebirth, my friend Janet, who was playing the bowl, synchronised her playing with my contractions. She began playing the bowl when I started experiencing a contraction and stopped when I stopped. If the sound was not present when I started a contraction, I would insist that she or someone else play it. If it was absent, my 'abandonment issues' would surface. The sound was the most important birth support tool. It did not merely seem like sound vibrations floating around; it more like an invisible hand or a bubble of light holding me, keeping me safe and calm. Therefore, when it was absent, I would panic slightly, as what was holding me up was suddenly gone.

“Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand.” - Karl Menninger

This is why it is so important to watch and listen to a labouring woman's body and voice just as you would if you were actively listening to your best friend. The best listeners are those who stay present with what you are saying, follow your lead, and do not try to change the subject, fix you, or take over the conversation. This is the support person's ultimate duty when using the "SoundBirth Tools": to listen, to be present, and to provide that supportive sound that will "hold" a woman during contractions. Simple!

The first duty of love is to listen.” - Paul Tillich 

Sync and Sigh Exercise

For partners and other support people:

Invite the pregnant women to lie down comfortably and just breathe naturally. Sit beside her and notice her chest rising and falling with her breath. Then start to sigh in time with her exhalation. "Ahhhhh".  I recommend doing this for at least 2 minutes. I also recommend sighing out of time with her exhalation a few times so she can feel what it is like when someone doesn't follow HER rhythm. 

Afterwards share each other's experience. 

Swap over and do the same activity. 

You may notice the significance of synchronising your breath with another person's and being attuned to their body rather than your own. This connection and support can be profoundly felt by the person breathing. Conversely, it can be quite unsettling when someone is not attentive and sighs out of sync with your breath.

The point?

It is very important for the person playing the SoundBirth Bowl, to synchronise with the woman's contractions and to be there for her every time.

If she starts to have a contraction and can hear the SoundBirth Bowl starting to resonate she not only KNOWS that someone is present with her, she also feels comfortable to vocalise freely allowing her to experience all of the many benefits.   

If you would like to learn more about SoundBirth and how you can support a birthing woman in this way contact me!